Slightly lively

Slightly Lively is my friend A.R. She encouraged me to start my blog and taught me how to do it.
I love to read her posts every week. She is a poet.

One day she and her husband went to Mexico for vacation.
After this short vacation, she posted that they were getting divorced. I couldn't believe it. He rented an apartment for himself. And she was living alone, just with her cat. This was a really sad news.

A few days later, she wrote this post I want to share with you.


"The Stranger"

"The hardest thing to accept is that he's not there anymore.

Truth is he hasn't been there for a couple years, since he started doing... those things he does.

But I didn't know.

I thought we were happy.

I could tell some things were different. The way he hugged me with one arm only, as if telling me: I only hold precious things with 2 arms and you're not one of those. Swept kisses, in a hurry. His tone wasn't kind or sweet anymore, when talking to me.

I should've known.

Intuition has never been my sharpest ability.

I now know that I have lost him and it feels very much like an amputation;

sometimes I still think he's there, as he once was.

My lovely husband, who crossed an ocean to find me. The one who pulled me out of hell with his bare hands when our son died. The one I would marry 1,000 times over.

The hell he's in now is one of his own choosing.

No matter how much I stare at him, I don't find my husband anywhere inside the stranger he has become.

At home, my hours are spent between the Disney Channel and the Food Network, while I consider suicide and murder as viable solutions.

Then I think of how happy we once were and I start making drawings of possible ways to light up my drive way, in case my husband needs to find the way home, in case he wants to come back."

When I read this post, I cried. I couldn't help it. It broke my heart.

Sometimes our heart doesn't understand the language and nature of our spouse's heart.

We don't get married for a convenience. We don't get married to put together two salaries, or buy a home.

We get married because we love each other, to be man and wife, to be happy, to have joy. Because we can't imagine our lives without the other. Because the other person is our life.

We are not here to do justice, but to love.

We get married to live together, to be "one flesh", to raise a family, nor only for us but to raise a righteous people to our God, good citizens for our nation.

Una esposa feliz es adorno del marido.

Our own happiness goes with the happiness of our wifes. That's our goal. That's the purpose. Their happiness makes us happy.

While walking the path of marriage, we have to learn how to love each other, looking for ways to be happy, extending our personas and our lives to our children. It's a commandment.

I'm so sorry for A.R. Now I understand the title of her blog: "Slightly lively."